Hookers or Cake

Where the self-obsessed get serious about silly
I'm too wacky to be hip.

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  • Short Stories
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    • ------------------------------------- How this blog got its name

    ------------------------------------ There was a large painting of Evel Knievel shaking hands with Richard Nixon. It hung in the Mayors office. Late one evening after everyone went home. I took it down to the lab. I zoomed in on Evel’s left eye a 100x and enhanced it. It was an address. I went to the address. It was a modest, 1970’s style, split level ranch home in the suburbs.

    ----------------------------------- Inside I found a dead parrot lying on a waterbed. I revived the parrot with some saltines and adrenaline. We became good friends. The parrots name was Randy. One night a few years later while Randy and me played Gin Rummy, he sang me a song about a fire. The title of this blog was never mentioned but I sensed it, and Randy confirmed it by giving me ‘THE LOOK’.

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    •  ----------------------------------------- some tumblr friends

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    •  ----------------------------------------- some writing

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    tell me lies! Submit stuff
    • January 17, 2011 4:29 pm
      wondertonic:  Has your gmail been hacked, or are you engaging in a fantastic piece of performance art? I am receiving grammatically-intriguing emails from you about huitongtrade.com. I hope it's a new brand of email comedy, but fear otherwise.

      Yep my email was hacked. Hopefully I fixed it. What really pisses me off is that I’ve been toying around with a “spam” marketing campaign.

      And really the only way to tell the difference between what I write and real spam is that I swear alot - IE. Ghost Robot Cock fuck you out of money?! AND I tell you I’m spam. Other than that it gets a little fuzzy. Which I would usually find kinda hot but in this case   there are viruses involved.  So… not so hot.

      Hey thanks for everyone who messaged me and let me know… oh and I almost forgot…

      I wild sex party with APPLE G5. She birth 100 I-pads. Send me your bank info and naked sexy time pics if you want FREE FREE IPAD!!!

      20 notes
      1. jimmythemustascheman said: It’s cool. At first, I panicked, thinking that the aliens from the planet of Placebo had caught up with me. Then I realized it wass just spam! Oh, LOL!
      2. hookersorcake posted this
    "Well Liked" by Peter Vidani. For Tumblr.
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