Hey the greeter at Wal-Mart just told me the best story!
I went to visit my mother every month or so. We’d usually watch a movie or something on TV. She lived in this weird old apartment above a 7-11. I always liked that apartment. Years later they would discover that beneath the 7-11 was an ancient crypt. Actually, it was an ancient Chucky Cheese Pizza place, from the future. It was full of dead alien robots delivering pizza that did not exist yet.
Beneath the future Chuckie Cheese was a lost cave where the Druids of Gaul had once worshiped the virgo paritura (the virgin mother of god)
It was in that same cave that God got his first handjob and sprayed painted the words to “My Sharona”